Since When Did "The Gays" Get So Conservative?

My partner and I are always laughing about the sweet irony that, these days, many members of the GLBT community are pursuing more traditional ends, like joining the Boys Scouts and getting married.

Since when did we get so conservative?

Perhaps since we realized that we, too, should have the option to embrace the American ideals of baseball, hot dogs, apple pie and Chevrolet (how smart was that Chevy ad guy? Hope s/he is getting royalties on that slogan!).

One friend of mine who lives in Massachusetts had been planning a wedding ceremony and had been feeling thankful that she and her partner might have a chance to apply for legal rights through a civil union. But, during the planning period for her wedding, the Massachusetts legislature ruled that same-sex marriages would be legal. As the MA denizens waited for confirmation that this would indeed hold true, she mentioned how she had never dared to hope that she could actually get married. It seemed so far-fetched that it hadn't even occurred to her to ask that for herself. She had been willing to settle for whatever nuptial table scraps (civil unions) were to come her way.

To me, this is a perfect example of how a community which has been discriminated against ingests its inequality and forgets to take care of itself. My friend (as many of us do and have done) had accepted her role as a second class citizen.

Not long after the ruling came down, though, she got herself in line to get legally married. She and her partner enjoyed a legal ceremony on the beach in Cape Cod and then, several days later, exchanged vows in a ceremony in front of their loved ones in a more traditional wedding ceremony in Vermont.

I, for one, am so glad for her and her partner. And, of course, I'm a bit jealous. Given the current climate, we've got a long wait for equal marriage rights here in Virginia. But, hey, if Viriginia really is "for lovers," then the tide will have to turn eventually, right?

Yes. It will if we keep remembering to speak up for ourselves and ask for nothing less than the equal rights we deserve.

This blog entry is dedicated to the memory of Ms. Rosa Parks, who, through silent and non-violent protest sparked a movement that was long overdue. Our thoughts are with her family and loved ones on this day of mourning.


Posted by on October 25, 2005 10:00 AM
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